Anotherandom - Best Actor
Anotherandom - Best Actor
Descriptions
I would like to begin by not thanking everyone who made this performance possible.
I do not want to thank the people who told me I think too much, as though my brain simply needed to lower the volume.
I do not want to thank those who told me to take it easy. I would have loved to. Unfortunately, nobody explained how.
I do not want to thank anyone who confused depression with sadness, or treated it like a bad mood that could be fixed with sunlight, exercise and a more positive attitude.
I do not want to thank the people who called me dramatic whenever my pain became inconvenient for them.
I do not want to thank those who said, “You seem fine to me,” as though appearing functional was proof that nothing was wrong.
And I certainly do not want to thank anyone who praised me for being strong when what they really meant was:
Thank you for suffering quietly enough that I did not have to deal with it.
Still, I smiled when I was supposed to. I answered, “I’m fine,” with remarkable consistency. I showed up, completed my lines and made everyone comfortable enough to believe the performance.
So this award belongs to me.
For every breakdown postponed until I was alone.
For every panic disguised as tiredness.
For every time I made survival look effortless because the audience did not want to see what it actually cost.
Thank you to absolutely none of you.
